The substance in the silence
Hi wonderful ones,
You are filled with wonder :)
You have been stuffed, jam packed, crammed full of amazingness, like sardines wriggling in a net waiting to get out and escape into the world to spread more wonderfulness. Yes, that's you...
To all of you on the other side of the world we miss you deeply and long for the day when we can be close, allow Him in you to bless Him in us and Him in us to bless Him in you. One day. The more we live in the distance the more I understand Paul's cries, his longing to be with the ones that he has been joined with.
I'm so sorry for the silence - and at the same time, I'm not. I'm sorry because you are loved big and want you to know that love. I'm not sorry because unless He speaks, we have nothing to say. Websites, blogs, Facebook - they are all helpful tools. But Kingly tools to lead our lives? No....
Some of you will know Bex is in NZ. It just felt right.
Me and His boys have had such a fun time. We miss Mama deeply, but when Mum's away, ....................... (insert phrase based on the level of mischief you think is currently free to roam our home).... :)
It's been a full time. Zakai split his chin open and needed stitches, the truck radiator blew up, I've had multiple trips two hours each way down the South Coast of Durban following a Holy Spirit itch, and Zakai is determined to sleep in our bed and spread wees all through it despite multiple nappy changes in the night. Imagine the joy of getting into freshly clean sheets EVERY NIGHT?!?!?! I don't have to imagine! Bahahahahaha.. And in it all, the One who is Grace is enough. He pays the price. There is peace, grace within; enough for without if I let Him do it. Pressure is a lie. Rest is always on offer.
His name is Jack....
This morning, after getting children off to school and pre-school, I jumped in the truck to go and finish off a few repairs after said radiator explosion. It had been raining all night, and all morning, and was cold (ok, cold for us. 19 degrees cold... Brrr... I had to go back for a jumper). As I drove out of the children's village, I passed a man who was standing in the rain with his thumb out.
I drove past him, thinking about getting to the mechanic on time. FLESH.
Jilted out of my state, I felt to return. I spun around, drove back, spun around again and pulled up next to him, beckoning for him to get in the truck. He jumped in, smiling... JOY entered.
He apologised for being wet, and as we shook hands, apologised again for making my hand wet, "Sir, I'm sorry, I'm so wet. My name is Jack."
He was well dressed, well groomed, well spoken, articulate, sharp.... And sodden.
I felt like there was an opportunity for honest conversation so jumped in, "Jack, I want to know, be free to be honest, what do black people think of white people? What did you think when you got into this car? Is there hope that one day, you and I could be brothers divided by nothing?" We talked about the past, about the current, about politics, sport, mindsets, and the selfishness that so quickly, knowing its way around rises in our hearts and lowers our view to focus on our own lives and what we think we need.
He got a phone call yesterday for a job interview with a call centre in town. But he has no job currently and he, his wife and two year old son have been hustling, doing whatever they can do to eat. Friends, neighbours, odd jobs. They have no money. So he couldn't afford the $2NZ or 1 buck 50 U.S. for a taxi and none of his neighbours or friends would loan him the money - they know he doesn't have a job and if he doesn't get this one, how will he pay them back?
So he got up, went to the road at first light (just before 6am) and stood with his thumb out. In the rain. With no umbrella. He doesn't have one. Nobody picked him up. 100's of cars past, nobody stopped. At first I didn't stop....
As we talked I realised that unless I dropped him at the building for his interview, he would be late. Me, MY LIFE tried to get me to focus on the fact that I needed to get the car fixed... And if I dropped him off I would be late to the mechanic. Easy choice to make as I realised that in the moment, Father cared more about honouring Jack than getting my car finished, today. I dropped him off, looked into his heart, blessed him and gave him money to take a taxi home. He took my number. I'm glad he did.
People say you shouldn't pick up strangers on the road. You might get mugged, shot, killed or beaten. True. But can we trust Holy Spirit to tell us who to stop for, who not to, and trust Him with the results? When we pick people up, the taxi association gets angry, even when those people have no money for a taxi and have been waiting for two hours in the rain. Members of the association hold someone at gunpoint until a ransom is paid for the money we have, "stolen," from them. True. But is it worth it to meet all the wonder in a created man called Jack? Jack is wonder-filled, and I almost missed it....
The problem is that we think we are responsible for our lives, and responsible to protect our lives. I think I read somewhere that my life is not my own, I have been bought with a price. That I am to be careful therefore in my freedom, not to fall into a yoke a slavery again, the slavery of being responsible for my life. If I take on the role of being responsible for my life, being in control of my life, I enter the role of slave, and master, at the same time, and carry the load of both.
That load is too heavy for one who is free.....
Some of you may be wondering where we are at with all the things God has laid on our hearts practically for this nation. We have been so encouraged by open doors, His urging to continue to believe that He is faithful to fulfil what He has promised. We have had exciting offers, which ultimately we have turned down because they are good, but not right for us. The government is very suspicious of what we might turn out to be and are reluctant to grant us the registration we need to open a facility where our family can grow, so we continue on as grace allows.
But we don't need permission from the government to bless and give opportunities to adults... :)
We feel that He wants to setup a coffee business with a mobile coffee caravan - low setup costs and overhead and good profit. And mobile so you can go and find the feet of those who are desiring a cup of goodness. We feel like He wants to make some money so He can spend it. I wonder if maybe Jack might be our first barista. If you would like to invest in any way in such a venture, contact me at firstname.lastname@example.org.
I'll try and remember to let you know what happens with Jack.
Love you big, bye until next time,
What is truly in the heart of man?
"GET OUT! THERE'S NO BEGGING HERE. GO! NOW!! SHOOO!!!"
And so it starts.....
I never saw this. It's amazing how we can walk so blind, so unaware and so in need of grace. I never planned this - the idea of starting an NPO in a foreign country to serve the poor was never high on my priority list. Love God, sure. Be a good person, why not? But this? Surely not....